Catching Up...

I should be sleeping.  I should be catching up on other blog posts that have been in my head and I've been dying to write, but haven't so for now this will have to do.

I am now 28 weeks and officially in my third trimester!   Little man is very active at nights and I'm a nesting like a spring bird. (if that's a good example... too put it Layman's terms, I'm like OCD nesting)  So I finally have our room clean, which if you know me is a huge deal.  This would be the second time I've done this in two years... Yea, I'm that anti-cleaning.  But HEY! Go pregnant me!  The downside is, I'm so exhausted I just want to cry.  This could be a combination of being bigger and the fact that I haven't slept more than fours hours at a time in almost four weeks OR the fact that on top of that, I have a beautiful little toddler who is coming in to her Terrible Two phase of life, and she cares not how I feel.  OR the fact that I busted my bum to get our room clean... OKay, I'm just going to make a paragraph for my cleaning improvements.  It's my blog, I can stop mid thought and do this.

CLEANING:

I abhor cleaning.  I do not abhor being clean or having things organized, LOVE IT actually, I just hate being the one to do it.  Plus with a toddler, its almost counter-productive to clean.  Seriously, I don't know why I try sometimes.  ANYWAYS, I've really been thinking a lot about all of the changes coming up in our family, where we are, and where I want us to be.  I read a ton of great articles on LDS.org on marriage and family and have found the best way to change things, is to change myself and it will flow over into other areas.  I have a testimony of this.  Lose yourself in service (if you're pregnant, you might not always have the best attitude about it, but you will be blessed still. I've had my meltdowns.)  I've made it a point to have Mitchell's work clothes washed, paired off in days, and laid out for him to wear.  I also make sure he has clean underwear... this might be a given for some women, but it hasn't been unheard of for him to run out of both... my days just melt together sometimes, and it catches up with me. BUT I have been able to do this for the past couple of weeks and it's made a difference.  I've worked extremely hard to stay on top of laundry and keeping Bella's room clean and organized.  I've done my best to serve my family and have a clean and organized environment for them.   I can see the blessings as my husband has noticed my efforts and in return, it has strengthened our marriage.  With Mitch in school and working, we see very little of each other but the time we do share, is a time of mutual appreciation because we have a mutual respect that we are both devoting all of our time and talents into our family life and personal relationship. I've seen a change in him towards me, and it's been an inward change that I didn't have to say "do this" or "do that" but a genuine change and tenderness towards me.  And I appreciate that so much.  You want to change and improve your marriage, improve yourself.  See the wonderful things that come from that.  That's my marriage advice.  I've had a great testimony growth by testing the small and simple things.  I know this may seem trivial and insignificant to some, but for me, THIS IS A BIG DEAL :) So go me.  My room is clean and I feel accomplished.

SLEEPING:

I'm not.  I can't get comfortable (thank you restless leg syndrome. I.HATE.YOU.) I feel like I need to split my legs in half and no matter how akward of a position I try, I get no relief, so sometimes I can sleep for four hours at a time... which isn't adequate rest. Or I can't breathe if my legs are comfortable.  Or my mind races so I can't shut down to rest.  I do try and take naps when I can, but the OCD has kind of knocked those out as well.  My best sleep is from 6am-9:30am, but Bella has been waking up from 7:30-8 so I get the extra hour and half on the couch intermittently while we watch our morning line up.  I miss sleep.  I have two and half more months of this and I just pray relief comes soon.  I.Am.Miserable.

THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BEING PREGNANT:

• I love feeling Ronan move inside me, it's one of the best and coolest feelings in the world.  He loves music with a good beat, hymns at church, or the sound of Mitch's, Bella or my voice.
• I love seeing Bella talk to him through my belly button and have her "wash him"  (she really just rubs my belly)  She is going to be a great big sister
• Free boob job!  
• The urge to be an OCD cleaner
• The fact that we will soon have another awesome little Howe walking around and I can't wait to meet him and discover his personality
• The "spiritual high" I'll have after giving birth (or at least I had one with Bella for about a week)

THINGS I HATE ABOUT BEING PREGNANT:

• None of my clothes fit
• I don't sleep well, if at all.
• The swelling
• Restless Leg Syndrome (I.Still.Hate.You.)
• Heartburn
• The feeling of never feeling full, but also not being able to eat enough to fill up because there is no room to put anymore stuff
• Not being able to pee more than a teaspoon at a time ( might be a slight exageration, but I CANNOT wait to be able to pee and just feel relieved.)
• Dizzy spells.
• The OCD cleaning
• The emotional ups and downs that are seriously eating away my patience bit by bit

(I guess it's not thing I hate about being pregnant but the symptoms of being pregnant.)

So this post might be a mixed review, filled with uplifting testimony and straight up complaining BUT it is what is, and I am what I am.  I spiritual and hormonal pregnant woman, trying to make it in this crazy world!  

Bottom line,  I could not be happier about our little Ronan and all the exciting things coming our way.  I'm excited we are applying for Grad schools and it is seriously crazy that all this is going down around the birthdate of our newest one, but if I learned nothing else.  It's to have faith in my father in Heaven.  He has gotten us this far and I know He will help us the rest of the way.  If He brings you to it, He will bring you through it (or at least give you the tools to get through it yourself).  Faith can be really easy to talk about and harder to practice, but I am learning to trust in Him, in the things I cannot control and I am amazed at how much He has blessed our family.